Title: Not As It Seems (1/3)  (Part Two)  (Part Three)
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Dr. Horrible/Penny, Captain Hammer, Topher, Adelle, Sophie Alvarez, the ELE,
Word Count: ~2300
Summary: The Evil League of Evil is watching, so beware...
A/N: Dollhouse crossover, although there aren't any specific spoilers for Dollhouse, just general knowledge of the show. This is for fanfic100 using prompt 076. Who? 

 

 

 

The man next to her said something, but she hadn’t caught it. “What?” Penny asked.

“No, I love the – uh – air,” he stammered.

She smiled awkwardly at the odd reply and turned back to her washing. She saw that man every time she came to the Laundromat, but they’d never spoken. It seemed kind of dumb, but he obviously felt so uncomfortable around her she thought it best not to push it. She pulled a dog-eared book out of her bag, found where she’d left off and continued reading.

She got so engrossed in reading that she didn’t notice when he left. She didn’t notice a thing until the buzzer on her washer went off, jerking her right out of the story. She unloaded her washing into her laundry basket as left the Laundromat, walking around the corner to where a large black van was parked.

The door of the van slid open and a woman stepped out. “Hello, India. It’s time for your treatment.”

Penny smiled and climbed into the back of the van.

--

Two weeks earlier

“So, who’re you watching?” Topher asked, tapping furiously on the keyboard.

“Why do you need to know that?” snapped Professor Normal.

Topher turned round, waving his hands in the air. “I’m designing the imprint! I need to know who India’s watching and what they’re like so she can connect with them. She’ll be a proper person, not just a pretty security camera.”

Dead Bowie sighed. “It’s Dr. Horrible,” he sighed in a bored voice.

Topher paused. “Dr. Horrible?”

“You know him?”

“Sure, he’s a genius in his field. Surprised Rossum haven’t recruited him to be honest. I mean, stopping time? Transmatter Rays? We could really use tech like that.”

“Well, he’s applied again to join the League,” Bowie replied. “And this time Bad Horse thinks he could be worth a shot.”

“Don’t see why,” Normal grumbled. “We already have a scientist.”

“Yeah, and what have you invented? A bloody cybernetic jaw. It really comes in handy, you know.”

“As you well know, I aim to be completely cybernetic by…”

“Whatever. Anyway,” Dead Bowie turned his attention back to Topher. “He seems like he’d be a good addition to the League, he’s really keen on the world domination thing, and Bad Horse wants to keep an eye on him while we make a decision.”

--

“So, who’s my girl spying on?” Sophie Alvarez asked.

“This man,” Adelle replied, handing her a photograph of a skinny blonde man.

“And who is he?”

“You don’t need to know.”

Sophie raised her eyebrows. This man must be important. She had been working at the Dollhouse for a number of years now and she’d never been kept in the dark over the nature of an engagement before. And it wasn’t like India – and before her, Whiskey – hadn’t worked for high-profile clients. “I’m guessing I don’t need to know who’s employing us, either?”

Adelle shook her head briskly. “Suffice to say, this engagement comes from very high up.”

Sophie studied the photo again. “How will India know him?”

“She won’t,” Adelle sighed. “He keeps mostly to himself; our intelligence suggests that he barely leaves his apartment. His roommate does the grocery shopping and the like, it seems all Billy -” she indicated the man in the photograph “- goes out for is to do the laundry.”

“Okay.”

“He does his laundry twice a week, every Wednesday and Saturday, at 4 O’clock in the afternoon.”

“And India will be there too?”

“Exactly.”

Sophie frowned. “This doesn’t seem much like surveillance.”

“Our client is anxious that Billy doesn’t realise he’s being watched. He’s paranoid, anti-social, and extremely clever – if a strange woman suddenly befriends him; he would at best have a panic attack, and at worst trace India back to here.”

Sophie looked unconvinced, but Adelle added, “If the client is happy, they may want to step up India’s involvement with Billy,” and she nodded.

“I’ll go and get India, then.” As she walked out the room, she muttered, “Weeks spent waiting in a van outside a Laundromat? Man, I get all the glamorous jobs…”

--

One month later

Dead Bowie drummed his fingers on the table, bored out of his mind. Fake Thomas Jefferson’s voice had been droning on for hours now.

“… So with the elimination of the Pink Pummeler and the Purple Pimp, that brings our short-list of potential candidates down to three: Black Cat, Father Fearsome, and Dr. Horrible.”

There was a pause, which Fake Thomas Jefferson interpreted as the rest of the League being in awe of his speech, but was actually the rest of the League regaining consciousness after the coma-inducing ramble.

“So,” Dead Bowie said, searching for something to say, “This Dr. Horrible… how’s he shaping up?”

“Oh, he’s the one we got Rossum involved in, isn’t he?” asked Snakebite lazily.

Bowie nodded.

“And?” she asked.

Dead Bowie laughed. “Well, it looks like he’s got a little bit of a thing for the Doll.”

The other League members sniggered. “So, he’s out?” Professor Normal asked, sounding a little too eager at the idea. “Falling in love isn’t exactly evil.”

“Nah, not out.” Bowie drawled. “Don’t get too excited, Professor Boring. We could do with a decent scientist, after all.”

“Oh and how do you ever contribute to the League?” Normal snapped.

Bad Horse snorted and stamped his foot.

“I agree with Bad Horse,” Fake Thomas Jefferson announced.

“What a surprise,” Bowie muttered.

“Dr. Horrible is a genius, and he definitely has the capacity for evil. Skill-wise, he is easily the strongest of the applicants. We just need to see how far he would be willing to go.”

“Wait, you say he loves the Doll, right?” Fury Leika asked, directing her question towards Dead Bowie.

The zombie nodded. “It’s looking that way, yeah.”

She smiled. “Well, as we all know, love can be a great motivator for evil.” She gestured to her wedding dress. “And Rossum can program the Doll to do anything. We just need her to fall for someone he hates; soon we’ll see how evil he can be. He has a nemesis, doesn’t he?”

Fake Thomas Jefferson flipped though the folders in front of him. “Ah, yes – Captain Hammer.”

Dead Bowie smiled. “Oh, he’ll be perfect.”

--

Topher had been less than pleased when Adelle phoned to say that two members of the Evil League of Evil were here to see him again. He shuddered as he put the phone down. Wiping people’s minds was fine. Zombies and men with cybernetic jaws – and seriously, who was still experimenting with cybernetics in this day and age? – were just creepy.

Topher clapped his hands together with fake bravado as two of the most evil men in the world walked in. “Gentlemen! What can I do you for?”

“We need the Doll to interact with Dr. Horrible. He, uh, seems to have feelings for her.” Professor Normal answered.

Topher raised an eyebrow. Super villains falling in love was a new one. “So, Dr. Horrible and…” he opened up the imprint file on the computer and scanned it for the name. “…Penny are going to be a thing?”

“No, we want her to be with Captain Hammer.”

“The hero?”

“Yes.” Seeing Topher’s confused expression, Professor Normal explained, “We need to see how evil he can be, he needs to prove himself. Making him angry seems to be the best way to go about it.”

“Alright.” Topher scrolled through the screen faster, checking values and readings and comparing them with the diagram of Penny’s mind. “This should be easily done. When do you want her to start talking to Dr. Horrible?”

“What?” asked Dead Bowie.

Topher turned round. “Look, if you want him to get jealous over Penny, he has to think he has a chance with her. Trust me; I deal with stuff like this all day. If she rejects him, he’ll just become depressed. But if he thinks the only thing standing between the two of them is Captain Hammer…” Topher grinned. “I can guarantee that he’ll do everything in his power to get rid of Hammer. The two of them are nemeses, right?”

Professor Normal nodded.

“Yeah, that’s good. If he already hates him, it won’t take much to push him over the edge.”

“Good. Dr. Horrible is planning a heist tomorrow; that would be a good time for the Doll to officially meet him.”

“Tomorrow?” Topher snorted. “Are you kidding?”

Dead Bowie raised an eyebrow. “Do we look like we’re kidding?”

“No, no,” Topher replied hurriedly. “Just… that’s pretty short notice.”

“We need to act fast; Bad Horse wants the vacancy filled within the next few weeks. Ever since Black Death got herself wiped out by Super Nurse we’ve been a member down, and now that Time Science Blood Cloud is in orbit as well we’re even more of a target for the Heroes’ Guild. We need a new member quickly,” Professor Normal explained.

“Yes, but tomorrow… designing imprints isn’t easy you know, especially tailored to the level you want.”

“Well, if you can’t do it, we understand,” Bowie said casually, inspecting his nails. “We’ll just make sure Bad Horse knows that it was you who let him down – I’m assuming you know what he does to people who let him down?”

“Whoa, no need to be hasty!” Topher squeaked, holding up his hands. “I’ll have the imprint ready.”

“I knew you’d come round to our way of thinking.”

Topher sighed and ran his hand though his messy hair. “So, what’s the plan?”

“Dr. Horrible has been blogging about his need for Wonderflonium for a few weeks now. Tomorrow it’s being transported and he’s planning to steal it.”

“Okay. So if we get our Active in the area shortly before then… she’ll need an excuse to talk to him…” he tapped a few keys on the keyboard.

“We’ll let you sort out the details. Captain Hammer is bound to turn up – he’s never one to miss an opportunity for publicity – the Doll will fall for him, and we’ll get to see exactly how evil Dr. Horrible can be.”

Topher nodded. “Right. I’ll get to work. What time’s the Wonderflonium being transported?”

“10 AM,” Normal supplied.

“Of course it is. Couldn’t be in the evening, could it?” Topher grumbled. “Not that it’ll be a problem,” he added hastily. “Everything will be ready.”

“Good,” Professor Normal said abruptly. “We’ll see ourselves out.”

Topher waited until they’d left the room before pressing his fingertips against his temples and groaning in frustration.

--

Dr. Horrible ripped the letter open with excitement, reading it aloud for Moist’s benefit.

“It’s not a ‘no’,” Moist said cautiously.

“Are you kidding? This is great! I’m about to pull a major heist. You know the Wonderflonium that I need for the Freeze Ray? It’s being transported tomorrow.”

“Armoured car?”

“Courier van. Candy from a baby.”

“You need anything dampened, or made soggy?”

“Thanks, but… the League is watching. I’ve gotta do this alone.”

Moist nodded. “Okay. Do you think they’ll actually be there, if they’re watching?”

Dr. Horrible considered it. “I don’t know – they’ll probably send a henchman or something.”

“It would be so cool if Bad Horse was there in person, though.”

Dr. Horrible grinned. “Yeah, that’d be awesome. Anyway, my Van Remote still needs a little work, and this has to go perfectly. I’ll be in the lab if you need me.” He slipped the letter in the pocket of his lab coat and walked away, already planning his victory speech in his head.

--

Sophie raised an eyebrow at Topher’s appearance as she walked into the imprinting room. The scientist usually looked pretty scruffy, and Sophie figured that it was only because of how indispensible he was that Adelle tolerated his refusal to wear anything smarter than a Hawaiian shirt and jeans. This morning, though, he looked a wreck. There were dark circles under his eyes and judging from all the empty energy drink cans littering the computer desk, he hadn’t slept.

“So… I’m guessing India’s engagement has stepped up from doing the laundry?” she asked.

“Yeah, just a bit,” Topher said distractedly. “Uh, she’ll be doing some volunteer work for the Caring Hands Homeless Shelter, gathering signatures for a new building. Doc– I mean, Billy should be in the area at the same time.”

“And India’ll just be keeping an eye on him? Seriously, how important is this guy?”

“Um, no, and you don’t want to know. This time she’s going to get talking to him, hence the petition. We want them to become friends. Oh, and Captain Hammer – you know, the hero? Always in the tabloids, has a new girl on his arm every week – Captain Hammer will hopefully turn up, he’ll then ask her out because he flirts with anything with a pulse, India will fall head over heels for him because he’s a hero and I’ve designed her to, and Billy will get jealous. Hopefully. If everything goes to according to plan, which it better, because otherwise some rather nasty things will happen to me,” Topher chuckled nervously. “Of all the ways to die, having that done to you by a horse isn’t high on my list…”

Sophie blinked, filtering through Topher’s sleep-deprived babbling. “Wait, why would a hero be interested in some guy that hardly leaves his apartment? And a horse? Is this to do with the–”

“Shhh!” he hissed fiercely. “You aren’t supposed to know… you don’t want to know, trust me.”

Sophie frowned, but if it was to do with the Evil League of Evil, he was probably right. The ELE were even shadier than Rossum. It was best not to get involved.

“Just… make sure she gets there by nine, okay?”

“Okay. I’ll go and tell India it’s time for her treatment. Make sure you get some sleep after you’ve imprinted her, Topher,” she added as she walked out the room.

“Chance would be a fine thing,” he grumbled to himself quietly.
 

(Part Two)