Why Men Are Dicks, And People Who Think There's No Longer A Need For The Feminist Movement Are Wrong

[vettysazzy]

Last night I went out with some friends. It was a good night.

Unfortunately, they live in halls in Kentish Town, and I live near Caledonian Road, so we had to get different night buses home. I don't mind getting the night bus by myself - I mean, it's not my favorite thing in the world, but plenty of people on it at that time and I was sitting near the driver so I felt quite safe. Plus they have CCTV on the buses in London.

So, bus ride was fine. There's about a five minute walk from the bus stop to my house, and it's a quiet road even in the day time, so I wasn't overly excited about having to walk home alone at 2.30AM, but I was just hoping I wouldn't see anyone. I've learnt from experience that a woman in a dress late at night + strange, possibly drunk, men = at the very least having stuff shouted at you.

Sadly, that's exactly what happened.

There were three men walking on the other side of the road. When they saw me they started shouting things like "Why are you coming home alone at this time of night?" I just ignored them.

Then one of them said "We should rape her."

I've never been so scared in my life. Don't get me wrong, nothing happened - they didn't even cross to my side of the road. It was probably their idea of a "joke", but it was completely fucking terrifying.

I just... I don't understand. Who would ever think that that was an appropriate - much less funny - thing to say? And yeah, I know, walking home alone in the wee hours isn't the most sensible thing ever, but you know what? I should be able to walk wherever I want, whenever I want, without feeling at risk. What kind of world do we live in where a woman can't walk alone at night without a strange man threatening to rape her?

I feel really shaken up. :(

I'm going to go to my friends' flat tonight for a party. I think on the way I'll stop in the Police Station and see if they have any rape alarms. I'd just feel safer if I could have that in my hand if I have to come home late at night again.

Comments

[tasmin-dvelnahr.livejournal.com]

I would have called the cops. It is disgusting, the attitude of seeing 'rape' as something to joke about- disgusting and frightfully 'acceptable', especially amongst- I don't want to say younger folks and give folks a bad name- but I see it all the time in game (WoW), where the term 'rape' is something that is acceptable to joke about and give new and positive meaning to. For example in game, I have had guildmates say 'I got raped by....' to explain a defeat or 'We raped....' to explain a victory.

Those folks usually don't have a home in our guild very long, but it is disturbing how the term is being used and how acceptable it is becoming to joke about it.

[lokiiago.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I had to take some male friends down a peg cuz they kept using it just as some verb to toss around. They will not forget that conversation I assure you.

[sazz-k.livejournal.com]

I know, it's like when people use the term "facebook rape". Just, no. People don't seem to realise that using it as a jokey term directly feeds into rape culture. I mean, "facebook rape" doesn't seem like a big deal, but it introduces rape as an acceptable punchline and before you know it, you're pretty much threatening to gang rape a stranger "for a laugh". :(